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=Help America by planting your foot up Hollywood's ass=

 

When was the last time you saw a Hollywood movie? Ever notice how weak and futile the acting and plots are? The incessant romance comedies? The defeating stench of another J-Lo movie? Aren't you getting sick of seeing commercials of shitty half-assed chick flicks? Going insane after watching shows like Entertainment Tonight and Extra? Well fear not, victim of society, I will help ease your fears by giving you a new motive in life. Want to help out our screwed up economy? Well this is what I'm ordering you to do: plant your foot up Hollywood's pretentious ass. That's right. There's a reason why nobody sees any movies anymore, because almost all of them suck and ticket prices are getting too high. I've only seen two movies this year, because I'm not going to waste 8 dollars to see a bomb movie (not good kind of bomb) like Gigli or Uptown girls, I'm better off wiping my ass with that 8 bucks. The only movie I'm looking forward to seeing is The Matrix Revolutions, since the other two movies have all rocked, and maybe The Punisher.

Now why would planting your foot up the ass of every Hollywood executive help America's economy? A nice whooping on your part would teach those stupid fucks to get their shit together and stop mass producing so many crap romance comedies and chick flicks that nobody sees. Really, how many of you have seen Gigli and thought, "Wowzers! That was the most UBER movie I have ever seen!" You see, when corporations stop producing utter crap, they usually start producing better crap. That better crap is what people like to see, and if they really like the better crap, they will see the better crap multiple times. This causes more money flow, better stock market, yadayada. But if you're pleased with how it's doing now, there's no stopping you. Everybody likes a good bowl of smack, right? Hmm...